Why do so many of us believe that in order to belong, we must conform? We change the way we look, what we buy, what we do, and even how we live, in order to "fit in." I can't help but think that this way of thinking is part of the reason why the world is in the state it's in right now.
If we teach our children to embrace who they are, and what makes them unique, it's more likely that they will succeed in life and have a positive impact upon the world. We each have something special inside that is just waiting to reveal itself. We all have the capacity to do great things. To conform is to silence this potential that we all have.
Of course, there are certain ways that we all must conform. We obviously need to follow laws, to treat others with respect, to cooperate as members of a team (when necessary), and to live by basic rules of etiquette. As parents, though, we need to make sure that we are not teaching our children to conform in ways that will hold them back.
Parents need to help their children to discover what makes them truly unique. Believe it or not, it's not an easy task. Many people go through their whole lives without ever even coming close to unlocking what's really inside of them. Try not to let your child become one of them.
Have you heard of Dr. Howard Gardner's 8 Intelligences? This Harvard professor's theory is that there isn't just one way to be "intelligent." There are 8 ways. So, just because you really can't grasp math, doesn't mean you won't excel in another area. Hey, there are some pretty successful people out there who just didn't excel in school at all. Today, I'd like to share two picture books that provide you with powerful examples of a few of these "intelligences."
The first book is Salt in His Shoes: Michael Jordan in Pursuit of a Dream, by Deloris Jordan (with Roslyn M. Jordan). Michael Jordan is a perfect example of an individual with "bodily-kinesthetic intelligence." Yes, athletic ability is a gift, but like anything else, it's one that has to be nurtured. Michael was determined to succeed and worked hard to do so, even though he was worried about being too short. He shows "intrapersonal intelligence" because he understands his own emotions, and is able to use them to accomplish his goal. He knew what he wanted, and wouldn't let a perceived weakness prevent him from working toward his dream. What I love about this book is that it shows that we all feel unsure of ourselves at times, but that we should never let our doubts keep us from doing what we most want to do. Michael Jordan grew tall in the end, in more ways than one.
The second book, Weslandia, by Paul Fleischman, is one of my absolute favorites. It's a complete package, with inspirational writing, beautiful illustrations, and a uniqueness that is so rare these days. Any child who has ever felt "different" in any way (we all have, at some point) will appreciate this book.
The main character creates his own civilization and shows many different types of intelligence. For example, he shows:
- "logical-mathematical intelligence," because he's able to figure out this complex civilization.
- "spatial intelligence," because he's able to visualize and create a unique setup for his civilization. He even designs a large sundial and a platform to sleep on.
- "naturalist intelligence," because he understands how all living things are connected, how they can be classified, and how to use them to solve a variety of problems.
- "interpersonal intelligence," because he figures out how to create games, activities, and even products that other children will appreciate.
- "intrapersonal intelligence," because he truly understands what makes him happy and values his own uniqueness, and finally...
- "linguistic intelligence," because he creates his own language.
Wesley is comfortable with who he is, and gains the respect of other children by sharing his unique ideas. It's truly a book that celebrates individuality.
What I love about picture books is that they can help you to see the "big picture" of life in just a few words. We are all so busy these days, that we get so caught up in details. It's like we all have so many puzzle pieces, but don't have time to put them together.
Please take a few moments today to put some of your puzzle pieces together. What makes you and your family members unique? How can each of you make a positive contribution to the world? The answers might surprise you.
You can find Part 2 here.
